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  • Writer's pictureChristine McCarty


A word I am too familiar with. A word that haunts me every day. I live in fear. Yes, I wrote it and will write it again…I live in fear. My biggest fear? I will let my kids down. That I will miss something, not be there at a critical moment, or worse they never realize how much I love them.

I have always lived in fear. Even as a kid I lived in fear, but back then I was able to channel that fear as a means of motivation. Yet now that I am well into my adulthood, it can be debilitating. I think the fear is bigger and greater as I am now responsible for my family, which is understandable, but that shouldn’t warrant living in fear every day…yet I do!

Whether you are raising a special needs child or a typical child, we all have fears raising and caring for our children. So how do we cope? I believe there are no shortcuts. We simply need to face it, embrace it, and find ways to use it to our advantage just as I used it as a motivational tool as a child.

That all sounds dandy on paper, but how? For many of us, raising a special needs child only compounds the issue. Below are some of the ways I cope with my fear:

  1. Movement

    1. I work out every day. Yes, every day. I make time for it as it’s the one thing I can control, and no one can take it away from me (mind you I get up at 4am to ensure no interruption but that’s my cross to bear). Movement is medicine. It combats fear like a superhero. There’s science behind the positive effect of the endorphins that are released when exercising. Doesn’t matter what form, just move your body, and sweat! There will never be a workout you regret. Only the one you don’t do.

  2. Reflect

    1. Go back in time to something you thought wasn’t possible and now is. Visualize it and see how far you have come. I do this a lot with Addy and her accomplishments, but also mine around fitness. We all need reminders how far we have come, not how far we need to go.

  3. Plan

    1. Many of you know that I plan my life away! I have a plan for everything! In all seriousness, take the fear and write out a plan on how you envision getting through it. You will be surprised how quickly that fear will turn into a goal once you write out a game plan that works for you.

Look, I’m not saying I have all the tools or answers to wash away your fears. But for someone who lives in fear every day, I am learning to use it as a motivational tool once again.

Much love,

Raising Addy

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