The term "ride or die" initially started in the 1950s as biker slang meaning: if a biker couldn't ride, then they’d rather die. Obliviously, this has evolved over the years and now refers to relationships between people. A ride or die friend is more than a best friend. It's that person you can always count on through thick and thin – during any of life's struggles
Now you might be asking, what does ride or die have to do with raising a special needs child? In my opinion you need those people (your ride or die) you can rely on no matter where life takes you. How at any moment a curve ball can be thrown at you and sometimes we can’t catch it ourselves and we need help. That’s when you call/lean on your ride or die!
Every moment is different when raising children, especially a special needs child. For me, I sometimes can’t predict what might throw Addy into a tantrum which can spiral out of control. It feels as though I’m constantly walking on eggs shells and at times it’s just plain awful, no other way to describe it.
This type of environment/situation can destroy relationships, families, life in general. So how do I/we manage to survive and hopefully thrive?
I have my ride or dies. The people I surround myself with. At any moment these people will step in to relieve me/takeover so I don’t lose it (my husband), they pick-up the phone when they have a million other things going on, but know I need to talk/strategize about how I am going to make it to the other side (my BFF, Alex R), when I have given up hope that the task/meltdown will never end or I don’t know how to get Addy to the next level/phase they know exactly what to do (Team Addy), or finally, when I feel pity/why me and how will I ever get through this (my parents)…these people are always there for me.
They are my ride or dies. They make the worst times a bit easier, the impossible seem possible. They have kept me going, Addy going and most importantly our family going!
So, if you are one of those people that don’t think/believe you need help (trust me I was one of them) you do. They come into play when you have hit a brick wall and help you come up with ideas/solutions/a break/a shoulder to cry on and to give you the courage to go on.
To my ride or dies, THANK YOU as without you none of this is possible.
Much love,
Raising Addy
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